Restoring Common Sense

Just For Fun

Welcome to our “Just For Fun” page.  We hope you get a chuckle out of our postings here.  We welcome your submissions for inclusion and ask that you send them to our Customer Service e-mail address.  Inclusion will be at the sole discretion of the Restoring Common Sense staff and we ask that you remember that this is a family friendly site.  Enjoy! 

 

A great discovery!

New Periodic Table Element

New research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second to take from four days to four years to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 5 years; It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical level of concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.  When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

Do we have enough of these trucks in DC?

Are there enough of these trucks in Washington?

Code Cracked

After a President has been in office for 6 months it is customary for the last President to send a note of congratulations to the new one.

So yesterday when the note came from Bush to Obama, the President was somewhat troubled because it was written in code and all it said was:e. They called in the chief of staff and the head of Secret Service detail and they were unable to determine the meaning of the note.

370H-SSV-0773H

This troubled him as he had always heard from his peers how former president Bush was perceived to have been scholarly challenged.

So he took the note to his wife. She was unable to decipher it.

They called in the VP, and he was unable to decode the messag

Next he called in the head of the Senate and Speaker of the House. They both were mystified by the meaning of the coded message.

Now there was complete panic in the oval office.

They called all of their contacts in the media and sent copies of the note to all of them, and not one was able to come up with an answer

A special emergency meeting was called by the staff.

All branches of the military, counter intelligence, CIA, FBI were called in, and the best minds were unable crack the code.

After a sleepless night, a now humbled President picked up the phone and called the former president, and asked him the meaning of the note.

Bush chuckled and replied: ‘Dude …………..You’re holding it upside down!’